


To Become Light

by Breadthecat



Category: Sander Sides, Sanders Sides
Genre: Amnesia, Dark side Logan, If I make this a full fic it definitely will have the other sides, Memory Loss, Memory Wipe, angst time hell yeah
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:20:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23977345
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Breadthecat/pseuds/Breadthecat
Summary: His plan, Logan would admit, scared him. He would loose everything and had no way to undo what he was about to do. It would be up to fate, hoping the others would take pity on him and let him in. Ignore his past. It was a desperate attempt and he knew it,  but he felt like he was out of options. He couldn’t stand being forced into silence anymore. They would never listen to a dark side.
Comments: 11
Kudos: 93





	1. Chapter 1

“If I- if I want them to listen-“ he paused, swallowing thickly, “if I want Thomas to listen, I have to change.” Logan was confirming his own decision, insisting to himself that it was right. It was what he had to do if he wanted to make any sort of positive impact. 

Yet tears streamed down his cheeks, leaving dark stains in their wake. His plan, he would admit, scared him. He would loose everything and had no way to undo what he was about to do. It would be up to fate, hoping the others would take pity on him and let him in. Ignore his past. It was a desperate attempt and he knew it, but he felt like he was out of options. He couldn’t stand being forced into silence anymore. They would never listen to a dark side.

Slowly, Logan approached the pedestal, the Creativity Crown glimmering in the spotlight. The metal was cold to his touch, having been left locked away for so long. He turned it in his hands, the smooth surface gliding easily. The magic properties of the crown would make the process easier, a perfect vessel. Something he would unlikely ever see again, he wouldn’t have to worry about the subconscious temptation. Odds were he wouldn’t even know it existed, even less so know where it was or that it was still around. Perfect. Too perfect, the frightening process too easily done for comfort. 

He held the crown to his forehead, closing his eyes and focusing. Letting his memories slip away from his mind, trickling into the crown. He could faintly see the light behind his eyelids that now streamed from him to the crown. As his memory left him, his senses grew hazy, fading by the second. 

He wasn’t conscious when he fell back, when the process was complete.

He couldn’t be a dark side if he didn’t remember being one. He was reset. If they were smart, if they had empathy, they would take him in. He would make things balanced.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the past and in the present. Er, present-ish. More like “less in the past”

“I HAVE TO, JANUS” Logans broken voice echoed in the deathly silent room. Janus opened his mouth, then closed it, fighting tears. “I have to...” logans arm was caught in his grip, a futile attempt to stop Logan.

“We will loose you... forever” janus’s voice was breathy, he could barely get the words out.

“We don’t know that.” Logan lied. 

“We can figure something else out, please. We can get remus and Virgil and we can-“

“I can’t wait anymore, I can’t. I can’t bare to sit back and watch things crumble. This is my plan and I’m sticking to it”

“You’re always so stubborn...” Janus whispered, a sob cutting him off. His grip loosened and Logan gently pulled away. Janus’s arms fell to his sides in defeat. 

“It’s going to all be ok, I promise.” 

Janus shook his head, “you can’t promise that.”

Logan took a step back, “it’s for Thomas’s own good.”

“I know...”

—

“-gan, are you ok?” There was a gentle hand on his shoulder, light burning through his eyelids. His head pulsed in pain, foggy and aching like he hit the floor too hard. His eyes fluttered open, wincing in the light.

“Where?- who?” The fog was quickly flooded with questions. Where was he? Who was the man infront of him? He scrambled back in panic. The others eyes widened and reached out for him, his form blurry.

“Hey- hey, it’s ok kiddo. I’m Patton, your in my room. You must of hit your head pretty hard” Pattons voice was gentle and reassuring. A second pair of hands put something on his face. 

“What are you- ah.” Logan blinked, his vision sharp again. His hand trailed to the frame, eyes watching Patton. Scanning Pattons face. “We have the same glasses...” Logan mumbled.

“Oh- Ahah, yeah. Your glasses broke when you fell, you’re wearing my spare. Good thing we need the same kind.” As Patton spoke, Logan looked at the other person. Gears turned in his mind but came up blank. Logan barely raised a finger before he spoke.

“I’m the one and only Prince, Roman! Do... do you remember anything?” Roman asked.

“You’re a prince?” The question made him nervous

“Logan, do you remember anything?” Patton tried this time, before Roman could boast

“... Logan?”

“Oh no...”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprise, I haven’t entirely abandoned this fic. Sorta a filler chapter while I remember where I was going with this.

Logan spent most of his time on the floor, sleepy and weak. His legs wobbled when he stood, taking a hit on his energy. His back and head hurt. Patton commented in worry about bruises on the back of his head, some sort of concussion probably. They talked in hush voices around him, not sure what to do with him. He wasn’t ever sure when one day ended and another started, spending most of his time sleeping or dazed. 

One time when he woke up, he found books left next to him. Books of various difficulties, however he didn’t find any of them difficult to read. Reading itself was the issue, spending more then an hour reading caused his head to swim with a headache. 

Another time, he found a new pair of glasses. Patton softly told him that they found new ones like his old pair, however grew uncomfortable when Logan asked what he ment by old pair. He gently hushed Logan and shuffled the pillows in him makeshift bed, built more like a nest. He didn’t answer Logan questions and told him to sleep.

Sometimes Logan would find he had company in his bed. The nest was far too big for him, however very comfortable. Enough so to draw in Roman or Patton to sleep near him. That, or they simply fell asleep keeping watch on him. The first... little while, Logan wasn’t sure how long, they watched him keenly. Nervous as if he would do something. Logan didn’t know what. They slowly relaxed on that activity however. 

—

Logan awoke to Roman gently shaking him. He yawned, rubbing his eyes and peering up at Roman in confusion. 

“We are gonna watch a Disney movie, want to join us?” Roman whispered. Logan merely gave him a confused look while sitting up. Roman laughed, carefully grabbing Logan’s arm to help him stand. “Come on, I think you’ll like it.”

Roman led Logan to the couch and sat down next to him. Pattons eyes would flick between the movie and Logan. 

“I don’t get it.” Logan mumbled as the story played out

“What dont you get?” Roman hummed, certainly not expecting what Logan would say next.

“There is quite a number of flaws in the movies plot-“ 

—

The pair bickered for a solid hour before Logan wore out, still not having full energy to do much of anything. He tried to ask why this was, but they would either shrug or shake him off. Patton had disappeared at some point during the argument. Roman scooped Logan up and carried him off, passing the nest Logan usually resided and into a room. Patton seemed rather pleased with himself as he helped Logan into bed.

“This is your room now, I’m sorry it took so long...”


End file.
